So it has been awhile since I have bloged.. but after a visit back to C-port hanging out with old friends I thought it was time. A lot has happened in the last year. Am I still dealing with the darkness of my past - yes I have discovered that there is much more in there then i first realized and it will take longer to get through then I thought. But I am, even if it a slow long up hill battle I am doing it - day by day taking steps forward - in hopes to finally someday be free of the stuff that holds me back from so much.
But enough of that.. Life has gotten really cool in the past year. let me try to explain- the best way to describe it I think is I have begin to see life as a gift - everyday we have as a gift - and I am learning to try new and exciting things! I have found some really solid friends out here in DV that have helped me down this road of metal change. To help me go from the ' well that's really rad but I can't because of this thing or that' to well let me try and see what happens! and I love it ! I have recently started going the Gym - now all of you who read this are all like - 'what no way not dawn - she's all eww nasty exercise!' But let me tell you I LOVE IT! boxing and kickboxing and MMA ( all things i thought I could not do ) i am doing -- i mean ya some things need to be modified sure but even in the last month I have gone from not being able to knee the punching bag - because I could not get my leg high enough .. to I can knee it now ! it is such a wonderful feeling ( even the small things) the confidence it gives you in yourself is amazing! - to look at the people that see nothing but the disability and say 'screw you hippie ! I can do it- it may be slow but I can - do not under estimate me !" it is such a wonderful feeling!
Ya I am still trying to figure were I fit in this whole ministry thing - but luckily I have amazing people mentoring me and are willing to see me succeed in where GOd has called me to be! I just need to be open and more willing to ask and see and not just assume - it is not an option because physically I may not be able to to A. B or C. God has a place for all of us.. we just need to see today as a gift and run with it and do all we can to make it the best day we can. Will there be days that suck - heck yes - that's life but we have two choices we can reflect and learn or we can dwell and not move forward. .. I admit I used to sit and dwell and feel bad and this that and the other thing - but now I am trying really hard to see what I can learn from the days that - are crap and do better next time .. this is a heard thing, but at the end of the day all we need to do is just remember that Our Dad owns all and is way way bigger then anything we think is tough! And He loves us even if we mess us ! in short HE IS AMAZING BECAUSE HE LOVES ME FOR ME - WITH ALL MY FAULTS AND FAILURES ! He is the best Dad ever !
I found this Quote the other day and i think it sums it up..
“Embrace that you have weakness. Because everybody does. Embrace that your body is not perfect. Because nobody's is. Embrace that you have things you can't control."
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4 comments:
Wow Dawn! I am encouraged to read this. You really are coming along and I can see that God is bringing you. Besides, you won't go easily! (even when it is your turn)! lol love ya
haha thanks-- what part did you like the most - just wondering :)
The "seeing life and everyday as a gift and learning to try new and exciting things" part.
And the "wonderful feeling" of "confidence" "( even the small things)" in yourself, part.
Ooooh, and this part, "to look at the people that see nothing but the disability and say 'screw you hippie ! I can do it"..."do not under estimate me" ! LOL, love it!
And the part at the end where we all just have to run with it and do all we can to make it the best day and there'll be days that suck, but that's life and "we can reflect and learn or we can dwell and not move forward."
And then you talk about your progress from going from dwelling and feeling bad to "trying really hard to see what I can learn from the days that - are crap and do better next time"
And my favourite: "At the end of the day all we need to do is just remember that Our Dad owns all and is way way bigger then anything we think is tough! And He loves us even if we mess up ! In short HE IS AMAZING BECAUSE HE LOVES ME FOR ME - WITH ALL MY FAULTS AND FAILURES ! He is the best Dad ever !
So pretty much all of it lol
the 'screw you hippie ! - is an a throw back to o-bad lol
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